Sidewalk Bends

It is easy to blame ourselves for not being better human beings, for not loving each other enough, for not being there enough when it counts. It is so easy to beat ourselves up that we even look for any reason to be hard on ourselves. We want so much to be perfect, to say the right things and do the right things. Perhaps what is more important than trying to be everything to everyone, or trying to make each moment as perfect as we want it to be, is that we just stop long enough to be ourselves.

Perhaps there is no need to impress, to lead with our best foot forward, because in being ourselves, each step is our best foot forward. By being ourselves, and removing those inhibitions that prevent us from saying what we want to say, and doing what we want to do, we bring honor to all that is. No longer ashamed, or afraid of being who we are, perhaps we can accept all that we each have to give.

There is no imperfection or miscalculation. There are no slights, or offenses. There is no spite, or jealousy. There is just simply understanding. There is understanding that what we each bring to the table is a different face of God, a different face of humanity. And if we are so ashamed of humanity, perhaps it is not humanity that we are ashamed of, but rather our lack of understanding of our place in it.

So let us not blame each other, or even ourselves. Let us simply be. Let us be without fear of reprisal, or judgment. Let us be without indignation and indifference. Let us be without regrets. Let us be.

Do not have pity on the dead for many have found peace beyond the veil we call life.
Do not have pity on the poor for many have found happiness outside of material wealth.
Do not have pity on the old for many have experienced a life we can only imagine.
Do not have pity on the young for they have a wisdom that has not yet been lost.
Do not have pity on your neighbor for he lives his life.

It is easy to compare our lives to others. It is easy to extend our wants and desires onto others. But can we allow others to be for the sake of being? Can we allow others to live for the sake of living? Can we allow others to love for the sake of loving? Our fears are our fears and we should not allow them to be another’s. Our desires are our desires and we should not allow them to be another’s. Life is difficult enough when we are trying to discover our own path, and it becomes that much more difficult when we try to forge a path for others.

So when we look on those we love, and even those we just meet, perhaps we can do others more good, by giving them the tools to forge their own path. Perhaps we can be better parents, better partners, better friends and better people by allowing others to find themselves, in their own time, and in their own way.

Do not have pity on others. Do not have pity on yourself. Instead, live this life. Live this moment for all that it is worth. Live it, not to please, or to appease. Live it to be you and do not have pity.

There are things in life that have to take its course. Although we would like to have control over every single aspect of every event that happens to us in life, we have to understand that what happens is not always understood right away, or ever for that matter. Grabbing on to every bit of life for the sake of feeling in control only leads us to doubt ourselves when the things we think are going to happen don’t quite match up with what we’ve told ourselves.

The road starts to disappear, a clear path seems to be overgrown with obstacles, and what we are left with is the trust that we’ll get through it all. We can grab the wheel of control tighter or we can let things take its course. However at some point we have to understand that no amount of maneuvering or trying to drive from the backseat will change the outcome. It only adds to the stress and to the feeling that everything has slipped from our grips. So in the end we can sit and enjoy the ride or we can try to avoid facing ourselves.

This does not mean taking a back seat to life, but quite the opposite. It means enjoying every aspect of it. It means not counting the time. It means not worrying about what’s in back of you or necessarily what’s two steps in front of you. It means living for the moment, regardless of what comes. It means accepting the lessons of life, whether they come as happy moments or heartaches. It means learning to take joy even in those difficult moments when we find it difficult to stare ourselves in the mirror.

We’ve got to face this road, but not alone, never alone. That is a choice, like all other choices, made from a place of love and serenity, or from a place of fear and loathing. Though we might sometimes come from a place of fear or hurt, it’s never too late to turn a new leaf, to shine a light on a difficult moment, and enjoy life.

Imagine time as set of concentric circles moving outward from a single starting point. As we move outward from the starting point to the outer most circle time moves forward. Now imagine that each adjacent circle is connected by any number of paths, with each path representing a choice. That choice could be anything from crossing the street to not crossing the street, to something perhaps more consequential like having a child or not having a child, or saving money versus spending all of one’s money. The circles, which represent consequences, stay the same, but the path to each circle can be different.

What if life proceeded in this way? Would that indicate predestination or free will? Would it mean that our choices do not matter because the result is the same? What if one could bypass a circle of consequence? What if one could remain at the single point? What if one could move between circles or what if there were more than one set of concentric circles, or circles that crossed other circles? Could our lives and thus our choices be distilled so easily?

Perhaps these questions do not matter all that much, or perhaps we place too much energy and concern on the time spent from going from point A to point B, when in fact they are the same? Maybe what is important is not the consequence at all, but how we come to the decision that leads to that consequence, or is it the other way around?

We can spend an entire lifetime contemplating all the possible outcomes and all the possible choices and still not be satisfied with how things turn out. If we allow our lives to be dictated by the fear of what may or may not happen, then we have crippled ourselves before giving life a chance.

If you are standing in the middle of a road and all paths disappear, do not fret. If water rises from the ground and all roads melt into one, do not fret. If your tracks get swept away and everything in front of you looks the same as in back of you, do not fret. All paths become one eventually.

Late or in a rush, all paths become one. Do not run frantic to find the start or meet its end, for you are already there. Stuck in a crowd or out on a limb, do not panic for you are already there. Enjoy this fluid life. It sets no boundaries. This is not a contradiction, just something to the mind, it does not please.

In this life we hold so dear,
We are most captivated by our fear.

If but once we could let go,
We could see what this life truly has to show.

So worry not anymore,
Enjoy this existence like never before.

There is no inner circle and no outer circle. They are one in the same. There is no circle.

There are no boundaries. There are no upper heavens or lower heavens. All that we wish to know is before us and not beyond some veiled mystery. There is no center or edge, for all exists equally. There is no rising above or sinking below for all that stands in our way is ourselves. We cannot ascend past our selves, but we can choose to accept all aspects that make us complete. We cannot surpass infinite expression, or fall short of its mark, for we are creation expressing itself.

When we turn inward, we also turn outward. Whether we choose to accept ourselves in pieces or fully embrace that which is, the result is the same. There is no time lost, or missed. There is awareness and understanding. Whether one decides to take the long road or the short one, there are no questions asked for the difference in the two is none.

Let not words separate. Let not our fears divide. Let no limitation become you. Let no disturbance become a hindrance.

Can you love me enough to see past my flaws?
Can you love me enough to see me through life?
Can you love me enough to let me fall?
Can you love me enough to let me pick myself up?
Can you love me enough to give me a pat on the back?
Can you love me enough to give me words of encouragement?
Can you love me enough to be yourself?

When I mope and throw a fit, I just want to be loved.
When I scream, I just want to be loved.
When I cry, I just want to be loved.
When I’m alone and hide, I just want to be loved.

I just want to be loved. Can you love me enough?

One cannot begin to judge what is in another’s heart until they have seen and felt what is in their own heart. In seeing themselves they have had a glimpse at all that has ever been. In looking inward, one is able to see infinitely outward, and in looking outward, one has seen themselves written in the souls of creation. In you I have seen my faults, my inequities. In you I have seen my strength, my joy. When I have judged your faults, I have revealed my fears. For in becoming you, I face myself. Judge me no more. Walk away from me no more. See what is in my heart. See what is in your heart.

Remove the fear of not being loved.
Love yourself.

Remove the fear of doing the wrong thing.
Follow your heart.

Remove the fear of rejection.
Accept yourself.

Remove the fear of regret.
Live your life.

Remove the fear of expectations.
Set no limits.

Remove the fear of anticipation.
Take what comes.

Remove the fear of loneliness.
See your place in the universe.

Remove the fear of tomorrow.
Live for today.

Bring peace to your heart. Remove the fear.

We cannot live in fear. We cannot live with the anticipation of harm or retribution. We cannot live with the worry that something we say or do may not be taken well. What we can do is have faith that regardless of whether the path in front of us is lit or hidden in the shadows, that our feet will land on firm ground. We can trust that even among the chaos and despair that sometimes surrounds our lives, there will always be compassion. And though we not always be ready to see it or accept it when it is offered, like a gentle hand, lending support, it will be there.

There is no need to lock our fears in cages or to strike against those who would strike us first. There is no need to race to be first and no need to shout in order to be heard. Through accepting our fears, and through understanding how they drive us, we can learn to let them go. And by letting go of our fears, we can move past the roadblocks in our lives. We can see that our enemies are not really our enemies. They are like us, fearful of what is in front of them, and fearful of what awaits. But together, we can overcome our fears. We can overcome our differences. What once appeared as a scary beast, can be a comforting friend in a time of need.