Sidewalk Bends

This is dedicated to my mom who inspired this thought.

Several years ago while meditating I decided to ask God to show me Himself. I asked Him to show me what God is, and to remove any of my preconceived thoughts of God and of existence itself. I asked that any internal and external biases be removed so that I may come to understand.

As I asked this through my heart, I attempted to quiet my mind. What I experienced and what I saw I could not expect. With my eyes opened, I became blind. I could not see anything. Slowly my vision went, and everything became black. There was not even a hint of light. With my ears straining to hear any voice or sound, I could hear nothing. The buzzing of the street lights disappeared and the distant traffic became non-existent to my ears. I had become deaf. Next my racing mind seemed to pause. All thoughts sank away. Not even an image or random thought had crossed my mind. It was quiet, yet at the same time I was all too aware that it was quiet. It was not overwhelming. I was peace.

Not a worry had occupied me. As I became aware of this emptiness, this lack of sensation, I began to see a tunnel in my mind’s eye. At the end or perhaps it was the beginning, I saw what appeared to be a green light, beckoning, almost like a cocoon. With that, I began to hear again and I began to see again. The image had disappeared and thoughts came flooding back.

At the time this occurred, I thought I had understood what happened. I thought I knew what God or perhaps my inner self was trying to tell me. I found solace in this quietness, this communion of sorts. And yet today I found myself seeing more understanding in this experience. I found God to be everything, and at the same time I found God to be nothing. I found God to be peace, inner peace, a choice seemingly made by me, but not entirely by me. Perhaps like a seed in our heart, God is there waiting to be nurtured, waiting to show us our true selves, our true potential.

What or who is God to you?

Self-immolation is a misunderstanding of the tenets of life. Love thyself. Love all others. Do no harm. When we do harm, even to ourselves for a perceived cause that we support, we lose sight of love. We may try to convince ourselves that by sacrificing oneself for a cause greater than ourselves we are in fact shining a light on the injustice, but we are in fact distracting from that which is without condition.

Love does not require all others to believe for it to exist. Love and truths that surpass the boundaries of the mind do not need capitulation or agreement from all sides in order to continue. Whether it is self-immolation through burning oneself or whether it is a person who decides to blow oneself up, the act does nothing but to place a light squarely on oneself. It is the ego, which seeks to be known that receives attention.

Love cannot be forced. Understanding also cannot be forced. When one decides to love without condition, understanding comes not far behind. The struggle is always internal, for in a hurricane, a sand storm or on a clear day, all that we try to suppress comes boiling up. When we can accept ourselves and when we can accept others, we will find understanding.

There is no inner circle and no outer circle. They are one in the same. There is no circle.

There are no boundaries. There are no upper heavens or lower heavens. All that we wish to know is before us and not beyond some veiled mystery. There is no center or edge, for all exists equally. There is no rising above or sinking below for all that stands in our way is ourselves. We cannot ascend past our selves, but we can choose to accept all aspects that make us complete. We cannot surpass infinite expression, or fall short of its mark, for we are creation expressing itself.

When we turn inward, we also turn outward. Whether we choose to accept ourselves in pieces or fully embrace that which is, the result is the same. There is no time lost, or missed. There is awareness and understanding. Whether one decides to take the long road or the short one, there are no questions asked for the difference in the two is none.

Let not words separate. Let not our fears divide. Let no limitation become you. Let no disturbance become a hindrance.

Bound leather.
Parchment paper.
Saints of men.

Stains of time.
Words warped.
Intentions lost.

Guidance sought.
Warped minds.
Confused soul.

Stay true to your heart. Stay true to yourself. In the face of pressure, in the house of another, do not judge. Accept as you wish to be accepted. Love as you wish to be loved. Compromise not the essence of your soul, but allow another to be.

A shepherd of men and women does not need a stick nor a lashing tongue. With his heart, he guides. He has no need to dismantle the gods of others, for he knows his place among all of creation. Superior to none, he does not dissuade those who are seen to be inferior. Blind to comparisons, he takes joy in all that is.

There is no better day, or another tomorrow; there is now. There are no loose threads, or misplaced beads; there simply is. There is no hope or regret; there is eternal acceptance. From the newest newborn to the most eldest among us, there are only wise men and women. There is no first or last and no best or worst. There is just the divine in infinite expression.

The idea of prophecy has captured the minds of many over the ages. From religious and ancient texts to self-proclaimed psychics and seers to seemingly miraculous personal experiences, men and women from cultures around the world have contemplated its purpose and power. From seeing, whether in the waking state or sleeping state, to feeling, physically and or emotionally, the experience and idea of prophecy has left many to question their faith, the workings of the universe and sometimes one’s very own sanity.

For many people, the future is thought to be unknowable, but bound by something we call “time.” Just out of view it serves as inspiration, and hope for something better. It serves as motivation for improving one’s current state of existence. For others, the future is thought to be knowable, but only in dribs and drabs. Sometimes dreamlike, it entices the seer. What could be the reason for having a glimpse into the future? Is it really the future that is being seen, or has all of this happened before?

Regardless of whether what is seen serves as a warning or a fanciful “what if” moment, the experience often serves as a reminder of the mysteries that surround us. When one sees what they perceive as the future, are they an observer, or do they remain an active participant in their own lives? The idea of free will comes into question and suddenly one is thrust into contemplating a future and life that has already been predetermined. If life and existence itself were predetermined, is the value of life suddenly cheapened? Is birth, death and all that comes in between simply a formality?

Perhaps the question of predetermination and free-will are more a matter of perception than practicality. For many the idea of a predetermined life is slavery draped in different clothes. For others it is the acceptance of choices made long ago, but also made in this very moment. What if every choice, and every choice resulting from that choice, and so on, for all possible choices of every creation, existed all at once? What if like the threads of a blanket, by pulling and manipulating one thread, each thread of that blanket were affected? And so in being able to understand one choice, one has the ability to understand all other choices affected by that single choice and all other choices before it.

In that breathe, perhaps the past, present and future are all the same, existing simultaneously, although for many, experienced one at a time. Like a series of dominoes in every which direction that fall and reset themselves, the past, present and future are continuously unfolding. From the view of the domino it only knows itself, and what comes immediately before and after it. When seen together, one path is realized, and sometimes more than one path is realized at a given time. Which is the present? Which is the past? Which is the future? Does it matter?

When our choices are realized, maybe it is not the order in which they are seen that matters, but rather what is learned or understood in that moment. Like an intricate dance, all of existence is being expressed, and what we choose to see is up to us. Suddenly the power of prophecy lay not in the future, but in understanding the eternal now.

Do not turn your back on love. When all seems lost, and you are walking in the desert aimlessly seeking a way out, do not turn your back on love. Do not follow the haphazard as they flee into the night. Do not turn your back on those who would only show a way out. Do not turn your back on those who would only remind you of what is possible.

Hold your chin up and remember who you are. Hold your chin up and remember the love inside. Hold your chin up and enjoy what is all around. Worry not about those who would proclaim doom. Worry not about those who have run in fear. Worry not about the desert night. Follow the guiding light of your heart.

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photo: LIFE Magazine; Hindus Gather At Sacred Rivers For Kumbh Mela Festival

Would you give a piece of your soul to someone or something if you knew it could bring them back? Would you give a piece of your soul to someone if you knew that it would help them see the truth? Would you give a piece of your soul if you knew you could not get it back? What if our souls did not belong to us? What if they belonged to everyone? What if what we thought were individual souls, were in fact the pieces of our self that we remembered? What if our souls were like drops of water in an ocean of souls? What if we were constantly giving of ourselves and receiving of others? Would we still exist as individuals? Would we remember who we are?

We are like the ocean. From many drops We are One. Thrust your fist into the ocean and grab a fist full of knowledge. Through your hands it escapes, but become the ocean, and understand there is nothing to grab. There is nothing even to give. There is acceptance and realization. United in a single dance, We are One.

Can a person be holy and still persecute someone they deem evil? Can a person know love and then persecute someone for not finding love themselves? Can a person know love and then persecute someone when they find love in a different way? If the devil tried to teach you something, would you dismiss him simply because he was evil? If you didn’t take the time to know, could you ever find out?

Can a person know God and then proceed to tell another they did not? Can a person have a relationship with the Creator, and then wash their hands of His creations? Can a person know love, without knowing the Divine? Can a person love them self and still damn others for their beliefs?

Perhaps if we spent the time to understand others, we would not find it necessary to condemn someone for missing some mark. Perhaps if we really knew ourselves, we would not require others to subjugate their beliefs on our behalf. The dEvil goes by many a name, and yet so do We.